Body Doubling: our Secret weapon

For years, my AuDHD brain lived in a painful boom-bust cycle. Like a little tyrant my brain would refuse to do anything until it was adrenalin fueled by a terrifying deadline. I’d ride the wave of hyperfocus to get everything done, only to crash into complete burnout for weeks....or months. Sound familiar? My late diagnosis finally gave a name to this pattern, and gave me the self compassion to understand myself better but it didn't change the reality that as a parent, carer, peer worker and a team leader, I couldn't afford to burn out.

I needed a sustainable way to show up for others while still taking care of myself and adulting somehow.

I found it in the beautifully simple practice of body doubling and after realizing how powerful it was, we evolved our service to focus on this core concept. It’s not just a productivity hack; it's an act of self-compassion for a brain that's simply wired differently. Put simply, our brain seeks out dopamine hits in everything we do, so we are wired for fun and interesting...not the boring mundane essential life tasks.

Yawn

Body doubling is just being in the same space as another person while we each work on our own stuff.  The gentle, external accountability is just enough to get me started on a tough task, without the internal pressure that leads to a crash. It's how I now navigate "adulting" without the shame or exhaustion. (okay, so I still crash sometimes but it is a practice…)

A Simple Guide to Getting Started with Body Doubling

Ready to give it a try? It's easier than you think. You don't need fancy apps or special tools—just a willingness to be present.

1.  Find Your Peer: This can be a peer worker, a trusted friend, or anyone else you feel comfortable with. The key is to find someone you don’t feel pressure to entertain.

2.  Make an Agreement: Hop on a video call or a phone call. State your intentions simply: "Hey, can we body double for 30 minutes? I need to tackle my inbox/clean my room/fold my laundry" Your peer will set a goal to do something as well. This sets a clear, no-pressure expectation, just helps to set an intention for your own self accountability.

3.  Get to Work (or Not): Mute your mics if you prefer silence, but keep the video on. This visual connection is what provides the gentle accountability. Start your task. If you get distracted, just look at your peer on the screen. Their silent presence will often be enough to pull your focus back.

4.  Acknowledge the Win: When the time is up, or you finish your task, unmute and celebrate your small victory! A quick "I did it!" is all it takes to reinforce the positive loop.

This practice ensures that I can keep holding space for others, because it’s a commitment to a softer, more compassionate life free from the endless cycle of burnout. In fact it is why our home base is called ‘the space’, not a boring office, it’s a (sometimes) quiet, supportive sanctuary where we hold space for each other to be productive and work our magic together.

Need this kind of support in your life? We offer limited sessions of Body Doubling peer support online to make this accessible for our sisters in regional and remote locations! Get in touch with us to make a referral hello@mindfullivingsupports.org